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This is the archive of previously 'Exposed' celebrities and historical figures.

Everybody farts, even so called 'Famous' people fart. Here at SillyJokes we are studying the archives, consulting the experts (and making a few bits up), to bring you a comprehensive list of the most famous people from history, their farting habits and most crucially whether they would ORDER the Remote Controlled Fart Machine.

Father Christmas

Father Christmas spends 364 days on an extremely healthy diet and then wham! in one night the man in the jolly red suit has to eat his way through tons of mince pies, gallons of milk and lakes of sherry. Is it any wonder that he puts on a little weight? At about 3pm on Christmas day the exhausted and relieved Santa lets off one enormous fart, drowning out the Queen's riveting speech.

Would he Order the Fart Machine........ YES!


Queen Victoria

Thought by most to be a prude, in many way she was. But when it came to farting she could hold her own with any Rugby team after a curry night. She could often be heard above the din of state occasions Trumpeting like a Trooper.

Would she Order the Fart Machine........ YES!


Albert Einstein

E=mc2 Einstein's most famous theory, but what does it mean in laymans terms? When you eat too much Beans, Brussel Sprouts and Beer, it doesn't take a genuis to work out you will get a seat to yourself on the bus. Albert himself couldn't resist the odd egg sandwich with all the attendant side effects.

Would he Order the Fart Machine........ YES!



Sir Cliff receives his coveted 'Sprout Award' from the Queen of England.

Sprouts, Sir Cliff and Christmas Present

All year you avoid your relatives like the plague. What a cruel twist of fate it is, therefore, that when you finally do all get together at Christmas, tradition forces you to eat Brussel Sprouts en masse. This lowly vegetable would be nothing without the patronage of Sprout Ambassador Sir Cliff Richard. He's so fond of Brussel Sprouts, that if it weren't for canny record exec's we'd be shopping to the sound of 'Brussel Sprouts and Wine'. What a relief it is to know that Sir Cliff cannot get an invite to anybodies Christmas because, contrary to his whiter than white image, he farts like a Derby Winner.

Would he Order the Fart Machine........ YES!


The Bible's Three Wise Men

They came from afar, following a star, eating nothing but figs! By the time they got to Bethlehem they smelt worse than the camels. This is where they made a decision which would earn them the title of Wise Men for ever more. They quickly ditched their original, and more traditional, gifts of a bottle of cheap plonk and a box of Roses Chocolates in favour of the fragrant Frankincense and Myrrh which covered their appalling stinks. They kept the gold because there were no Remote Controlled Fart Machines available in olden days!

Would they Order the Fart Machine........ YES!

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