Do you need something silly?
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Life-sized plastic tarantula.
Don't be mistaken, he doesn't have 10 legs!
Its 8 legs, 2 pedipalps (short two at front) and a pair of spinnerets at the back. Just the way it should be.
Flip him over and those big yellow chelicerae (mandibles) are hiding a pair of painted fangs.
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Stretchable Rubber Bug (1 of Assorted)
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